Who Do You Love?

So, Ben left for Hawaii.  He will be gone for two weeks, which is cool.  He doodled a cute little countdown calendar on the whiteboard in our kitchen, and it made my heart melt.  Now that he is gone people have been asking me nonstop if I miss him, and everyone seems to be asking, "how are you holding up with him gone?"  I know that people mean well, and I know that he meant well with the calendar, but it all really made me think.

I felt a tad sad thinking about him being gone for two weeks, because I love him.  I like coming home to him, and hearing about his day.  However, I am not exactly devastated that he is gone.  I go to school full-time, work full-time, have tons of friends, and have plenty of training, cooking, reading, and blog writing to do.  I mean, really, it would be a bit pathetic if I was devastated or sad over two weeks of him being gone, right?

The sum of things has made me evaluate some stuff.  I love him, and I love our life together.  I like building our life together.  We do fun stuff, and Ben is my best friend, but I have a lot more self-love now than I have ever had.  Spending time alone isn't bad, in fact, it is kind of nice.  I had a great day in class, and kicked some butt (Chelsea style) in jits last night.  I was feeling great, and it continued when I went home to the empty house.  I made myself a steak sandwich on some delicious fresh ciabatta bread, ate half of the juiciest cantaloupe that I have ever tasted (Harmon's produce department is the best!), watched a movie, read Cosmopolitan from cover to cover (mostly to gauge just how sexist this "female friendly" magazine is), and I splurged on a mini Haagen-Dazs ice cream.

Who do I love?  I love tons of people.  But, of all of the people that I love, I have really turned into my favorite.